Sometimes I just want a way out
Sometimes that is without a doubt
Sometimes I can’t see past myself
sometimes I’m tired of asking for help
Sometimes I have Joy and peace
Sometimes it’s the end I welcome to meet
Sometimes I am so lost
Sometimes I can’t bear my consequences and their cost
Sometimes becomes more than that
Sometimes I just back track
Sometimes I seal my fate
Sometimes it’s always because of my mistakes
Sometimes the pressure is too much
Sometimes I’ve just had enough
Sometimes I drive myself away
Sometimes I have no voice I cannot say
Sometimes takes me for a ride
Sometimes it’s isolated and I hide
Sometimes I’m just ready to leave
Sometimes I am living in disbelief
Sometimes is often when I’m alone
Sometimes is being distant and cold
Sometimes is just a disaster
Sometimes it’s over faster
Sometimes I drink to ease the pain
Sometimes it’s too much and no need for me to explain
Sometimes I just look at someone else
Sometimes I wonder why I got the hand I was dealt
Sometimes I long for simplicity
Sometimes I screw up everything
Sometimes I’m not attending my life
Sometimes it’s alright
Sometimes I drift into a dream
Sometimes it’s more real than it seems
Sometimes I get lost in that place
Sometimes it puts a smile on my face
Sometimes has held true
Sometimes it’s what we need to do
Sometimes I just have to let go
Sometimes this I already know
Sometimes has to end
Sometimes can’t dictate who I am
Sometimes is consistency
Sometimes doesn’t have to be everything to me
Sometimes I get to choose
Sometimes I choose wrong, I lose
Sometimes isn’t a way of life
Sometimes it goes wrong or right
Sometimes is only Sometimes
Sometimes if you look it’s where you’ll find
Sometimes we wish the clock would rewind
Sometimes it’s your imagination loosing track of time
Sometimes doesn’t have to fill your Day
Sometimes God’s the only way
Sometimes for him doesn’t apply
Sometimes it’s on us , those who win survive because they try

This is a guest post from a dear friend and great talent. I hope you like it

Some days I just don’t live well

Some days no one can even tell

Some days I just shut it all out

Some days I live in doubt

Some days there’s so much stress

Some days I refuse to address

Some days I fight everything

Some days I don’t feel anything

Some days I merely breathe

Some days it’s myself I deceive

Some days I just want to leave

Some days it’s just about me

Some days I live in my memories

Some days they’re all I see

Some days it’s movies in my head

Some days it’s plain crazy instead

Some days the darkness strikes back

Some days I cower in the midst of the attack

Some days I just lose myself

Some days I’m weak I won’t ask for help

Some days I get everything twisted in my mind

Some days it’s tight and the reality I cannot find

Some days I tolerate this place

Some days it’s a neverending race

Some days I cling to peace

Some days it’s just to hard to reach

Some days I have to work so hard

Some days it’s the easy part

Some days I have no direction or clue

Some days I have the answers and see my issues

Some days I just want to be free

Some days that’s impossible because I cannot believe

Some days God is closer to me

Some days he’s the furthest thing from me

Some days it’s chaos and pain

Some days it’s peace and less insane

Some days I don’t want to show up

Some days I haven’t got enough

Some days I have to retreat

Some days God is who I want to meet

Some days I’m empty and I’m on the rail

Some days all I achieve is to 100% fail

Some days are good then bad

Some days I’m happy then overwhelmed and so sad

Some days I just walk away

Some days I haven’t gotten a word to say

Some days are just that

Some days I shouldn’t even look back

Someday this will all end

Someday I will no longer defend

Maybe Some day it will all be ok

Maybe Some day will be today

I know a lot of people who struggle with their faith. One of the major things that they struggle with is the authenticity of their salvation. I know that this is a topic of discussion for many people in the Christian community and there are opinions that fall on both sides of the argument. I absolutely stand on the position that we are once saved and always saved. There are a lot of verses that are used to make an argument on both sides of the debate, but this is one of those times that I don’t want to focus on the verses and lean on my heart. I want to be careful because I have tried to stay away from using my heart in making theological decisions and I have tried to make truth the cornerstone of my faith and of my ministry. With that being said, I acknowledge that the experience of our faith and the experience of truth plays a vital role in our relationship with God and our spiritual growth. Nonetheless, I think I am straying from my comfort zone, but maybe that’s a good thing.

Everything that we believe as Christians and ultimately our salvation is based on faith. The apostle Paul talked at length about the need for a trust of Jesus and of the saving work that He accomplished that cannot be explained empirically. I think that God made it this way on purpose. I think that He is a God of order and I also think that part of His order is the need for faith. I don’t think that it’s blind faith, but the need to trust totally when it’s not a decision that can necessarily be made totally by logical deduction is imperative. It came to the place where Paul just stated when questioned repeatedly by skeptics that I know that I know that I know. When it comes to salvation and whether we are saved, it does come to that place. At the same time, it is easy to see why some people struggle.

I want to offer some of my own logic based on truth but still from experience to relay my belief of irrevocable salvation. First, I don’t think that you can unring a bell. The sound and the power of the reverberation can never be reversed. Like our words and actions there can be an attempt to diminish or negate them, but the action itself lives on forever. I don’t think that it is possible to receive complete forgiveness for your sins, receive eternal life, have the Holy Spirit take up residence in your heart and have that in any way be reversible. I can’t imagine what that looks like and I don’t think that it happens. Ironically, feelings that i am using to justify eternal salvation can be used to feel that we have lost our salvation. This is where I will turn back to truth.

I think that there is this idea that when we are saved that the Christian life is just a bed of roses and all of life is just going to be great. I don’t think that this could be further from the truth. First, Jesus declared that they hated Him so they will hate us implying that salvation and a walk with Him will cause outside forces to attempt to make our life miserable. Now, we have the Holy Spirit to counteract that and while we can have joy we will still be persecuted in this world, Satan;s world. Second, while our destiny is secure our present and future are still enormously impacted by our past. Now, I know that God delivers us from past hurts and attitudes as He replenishes what the locusts have eaten, but in general that is not immediate and takes time as we are sanctified. I think that a major issue is when we see an incongruence with our destiny and our present actions. Glorification was never promised to us this side of heaven and when it is seen as a truth I can see why people question their faith. Just because our sins are forgiven doesn’t mean that we don’t sin any more.

Which brings us to another issue. After we are saved and have the Holy Spirit living inside of us it can feel, at times, that we sin more and feel worse about doing it. I don’t think that we sin more, but the presence of the Holy Spirit does make us more acutely aware when we do sin. Some people construe feelings of more sin as reality. Often, people will feel the need to get saved again or question their salvation all together when this occurs. This is where grace has to take over and we understand that we are more aware of our sin and that this awareness should drive us closer to the One who saves for healing. We must also understand that while God is conforming us into His likeness He does not hold the process against us. The only thing that God sees when He looks at us is His son. This is what allows us to be in His presence to benefit from the sanctifying process. Someone once said to me that a simple test of whether a person is really saved is found in the statement that dead men don’t wrestle. The simple premise is that the struggle between our old nature and the Holy Spirit creates awareness when we sin and an uneasiness about it. The same feelings that cause people to question their faith is the thing that assures it.



We have talked about surrender and forgiveness as it pertains to grace. I think that these are primarily personal aspects of grace and how we interact with God. I think that they are the foundation for the Christian life and they are a lifetime endeavor to work out as we have been talking about. It is primary for us to incorporate them into our lives for healthy Christian living so that we get the promises of God, peace and joy. When we have that we can withstand the pressures and circumstances of this world. I think that as we get a deeper understanding and implementation of grace in our personal lives we then have the opportunity to take that grace and practically use it to impact our world for the kingdom. The aspect of grace that I want to talk about today is service. I think that many people believe this to be a natural outpouring and activity of our Christian faith, but I really believe that while service is the responsibility of all Christians there is a deeper and higher level that God wants us all to aspire to and that can only happen with grace and an advanced level of intimacy with God.

I believe that God has an individual calling on each of our lives and I believe it to be our responsibility to get to that place where God can use us for His glory. Higher purpose requires deeper intimacy and that only occurs with more grace and constant filling of the Holy Spirit. It’s kind of an exclusive club that is available to all of us, but to get there we have to be totally dedicated to the cause. This is why surrender and forgiveness become prerequisites for service. We deepen all aspects of grace in ourselves as we draw closer to Him and then the fruit becomes evident and we fulfill the calling for our lives. I believe that there is that thing or things that God wants us to individually accomplish with Him. Not that God needs us because He doesn’t. I was thinking about something the other day and it’s not something that I have thought about for the first time, but I sometimes have those moments when God blows my mind as I get a fresh understanding of something that I think I know. I was thinking about how the God of the universe was before creation. In total harmony and fellowship within the trinity, and God, because of His nature, felt compelled to create human beings because of one and only one reason. God is love and while totally content and perfect with the trinity, He knew that there was love in His nature to give and ultimately the potential for it to be given back to Him. He knew everything that was going to happen and yet despite the heartache and pain we would cause Him the prospect of a potentially loving relationship was enough for Him to create the universe and put us in the middle of it. I am awestruck at the thought of the length God has gone just for the chance to have a relationship with me and therefore I am compelled to do the best I can to want to reciprocate. Within all that God has not required anything of us other than allegiance. He does not want us to strive to do anything but devote ourselves to Him and be willing to attempt to follow the will that He has for our lives. He is not asking us for performance just devotion.

The part of grace that particularly applies to service that is most intriguing to me is that we don’t have to do service to be loved by God. As humans, I believe we are very performance driven and there is a sense of worthiness and value that we believe to be attained by any kind of work or service. In the world, that’s how it works. Value is determined by ability and or achievement. But not with God. God loves and has loved every human being since the beginning of time exactly the same. He can’t love us any more and He can’t love us any less. This is hard for humans to understand because we are inundated with the idea of performance and often we take a performance based mentality to our relationship and service for God and this totally goes against grace. I am not saying that we shouldn’t serve, but not because we have to, but because we want to. God doesn’t want compulsory behavior. I think He wants us to understand His love and grace so deep that we have trouble doing anything other than love Him and serve Him with all our heart and will.

The best part of the whole process is that God promises that all we have to do is be willing to participate in His service. He promises to forgive us and keep on forgiving us and to sustain us and keep on sustaining us and He will do all the work through us to accomplish His will. Our job is to be willing and available for service and that only is accomplished when we are filled with grace and that only occurs when we are in fellowship with Him. It is impossible for us as humans to accomplish anything that is good for the kingdom outside of His fellowship. Within fellowship the possibilities are endless. My goal is to continue to grow in grace and see what God has in mind for me. I encourage all to do the same. The promised rewards and benefits of peace and joy are endless.